As our dog's guardian, our number one goal in our relationships with them
is always to set them up for success, in all things, knowing that this modern-day world is highly unnatural and challenging for many of them.
When wanting to introduce our dog's to new canine friends, it's important to remember that new introductions create BIG feelings for most dogs. For some, seeing a potential new friend is terribly exciting and they want nothing more than to access the new potential friend immediately, while other dogs see another canine from a distance and immediately bristle, becoming edgy while assessing the new "friend" who has appeared in their world.
Regardless of which big feelings your dog may be experiencing at the possibility of a new introduction, it is important for us to teach them the emotional regulation skills to set them up for success in greetings and establishing new relationships.
One of the easiest ways we can do this is by taking our dog(s) and their new potential friend for a walk together, to give them the opportunity to meet in a neutral way.
How to do it:
Before setting out to walk together, consider giving your dog's time to acclimate. 'Acclimating' most often looks like sitting, standing, or sniffing in an area within sight of the other dog and handler team, but from a big enough distance away that the dogs are able to be neutral and mostly ignore each other.
During the Acclimation period,
give your dog time to sniff, to look at the other dog, and allow them to be curious and to process their environment. They likely will sniff at the air, look towards the other dog, and check in with you. During this time, do not allow them to approach or to fixate (hard stare, indicated by intense eye contact and body rigidity,) on the other dog. You can prevent this with a gentle positive interrupter, such as "uh uh," before asking for a simple cue, and/or marking and rewarding any voluntary engagement with you.
After 5-15 minutes of acclimation,
(you will know it's time to head out when your dog is able to voluntarily engage with you while in eyesight of the other dog and handler team,)
set out for a walk together, giving ample distance between the teams.
You might consider walking one in front of the other and switching places to allow for each dog to have the opportunity to lead as well as to sniff the other dog team while walking and/or you may consider walking parallel, a distance from each other to prevent on leash interactions.
Your walk will be as long as it takes to see the dogs begin to become neutral around each other, able to walk loose leash/ pre-established leash manners, focused on their handler when cued as such, and not seeming to experience any big emotions or fixation on the other dog. Most often, this takes 5-30 minutes, depending on the dogs involved.
Once the dogs are able to walk and be around each other with no indication of fixating on each other or really big feelings, you can test a direct introduction. For some teams, you may feel confident enough with your dog and your understanding of their body language to let them off leash to play at this point. If this does NOT work for you for any reason (you're unsure what your dog is feeling, you're not confident in their recall around a new friend, etc.) keep them on leash, but be sure to eliminate any leash tension while introductions happen. Tension creates more tension. Letting go of the leash and letting it trail behind, or working hard to carefully maneuver around the dogs and maintain a loose leash are both great options to ensure you, the human, are not accidently creating tension during this greeting, which could trigger some dogs into 'Fight/ Flight/ Fawn/ Freeze Response.'
Ideally, dog introductions should occur in neutral territory to prevent big feelings and the likelihood of resource guarding. This often means going for a walk in a new location or a park is preferred versus doing introductions in a backyard or in a home of one of the dogs. Be sure that toys, chews, and other resources are put away prior to allowing the introduction to decrease the likelihood of increasing big feelings or triggering resource guarding behaviors. You also want to pay attention to each dog's interactions with their respective handlers and the other handler at this time, noting if either dog appears uncomfortable during greetings. Some dogs will resource guard their humans during greetings because of the big feelings they are experiencing. If you notice your dog become rigid or uncomfortable at any point, remain calm, stand up, and step away to prevent increasing big feelings in that moment. If the dogs appear to fixate on each other at any point, Body Blocking is an excellent skill to use.
You can learn more about Body Blocking here:
What do polite dog greetings look like?
What should I be looking for?
Polite dog greetings happen most often from the side or from behind, with a sniff towards the back end/ private parts. Dogs will often curve their bodies toward each other and dip their heads while sniffing.
Loose, wiggly bodies
The ability to look to their new potential friend and explore them while also being able to move away easily, get space, and/or check in with you (versus being fixated or observing the other dog attempting to control the dogs' movements and interactions.)
What are some warning signs to watch for?
Rigid bodies
Staring/ hard staring/ unwilling to look away from other dog
Whale eye (seeing the whites of their eyes)
Intense side eye
Charging/ running directly head first towards another (this is highly confrontational in ANY species and often occurs with over-socialized/ poorly socialized dogs and can cause fights easily)
Lip licking
Excessive yawning
Excessive shake offs
Tucking of the tail, curving of the spine to try and tuck the tail and head, especially combined with moving away
Lip quivers
Snarling
Nipping
Growling
Biting/ correcting
What do I do if I see these warning signs?
Break fixation/ Tension building:
Very calmly, call your dogs' name. If/ when they look to you, even for a split second, Mark it with YES!! This will hopefully break fixation and building emotions and allow you to offer further direction and support.
Help your dog create space.
This can most easily and safely be done by putting yourself physically between the 2 dogs while looking for the opportunity to mark and reward any visual check-ins/ engagement with you. (You can learn more about the skill of Body Blocking in the blog linked above.) Example: Penny begins to hard stare, get rigid, and her hackles raise. My response is to call "Penny!" If she is unable to look to me, I proceed with calmly and quietly walking in between the two dogs, perhaps calling her name once more, and looking for even a fleeting second of eye contact to be able to mark and reward her choice to engage with me and to disengage from the situation causing big feelings for her. Create more space by helping your dog walk enough of a distance away that they are easily able to look to you and engage with you.
After your dog has had some time to de-escalate, process their emotions, and get space, you might reattempt an introduction, depending on the dogs and how they are feeling. If you are at all unsure, go back to neutral walking and save a direct introduction for another day.
It is ALWAYS better to take introductions SLOW and to set our dog's up for success in new introductions,
rather than to risk starting a new relationship off with big feelings, dog fights, and/or tension.
One of my favorite things about our weekly Engaged Pack Walks, and walks structured similarly, is that it gives the dog and handler teams the opportunity to practice all of the outlined skills above. (Being neutral around other teams, focusing on their handler, acclimating, etc) If you'd like the opportunity to see and practice proper dog socialization, (meaning we are teaching our dog's to be neutral and confident in as many environments as possible,) join us most Saturday mornings at Waterfront Park at 9AM. (arrive 10-20 minutes early to give your dog the opportunity to acclimate.) You can sign up for Saturday Engaged Pack Walks on the website.
Additionally, you can sign your dog up to join Sara Tuesdays-Fridays for Engaged Pack Walks with her managing other local Engaged Dogs to give them the opportunities to work on all of the identified skills above, in closer proximity. These walks are good for established Engaged Dogs who have a basic foundation of leash manners and would benefit from working around other friends to build their confidence, neutrality, and ability to focus on their human handler. You can also sign up for these on the website or replicate your own by scheduling a pack walk with your friends.
While we do not typically do direct dog introductions and interactions during our Saturday Engaged Pack Walks, the walks are a good first step to set our dogs' up for success in establishing relationships with new potential friends. They are also an excellent opportunity to learn your dog's body language and what feelings they are communicating while working around other teams and new friends. The more we work with our dogs and intentionally get to know them, the stronger our relationships with them become and the more able we are to set them up for success in all things, including living their best lives by our side.
Some Notes:
Please remember that dogs' are captives in our care. If/ when you consider adding another addition to your home
(another dog, a cat, a kid, a bunny, etc.)
you are creating an arranged marriage of sorts if you do not give your dog
a say in whether this new addition joins your family.
Not all dogs/ cats/ kids/ ferrets/ any combination of creatures are compatible!! Just as we don't mesh with every human we meet, it is unrealistic to expect our dog to get along with or even co-exist with every dog/cat/ squirrel/ Karen/ etc.
Consent testing is important and taking the time to do proper introductions and training to set everyone up for success is crucial. (You can learn a bit more about consent testing here: https://www.choosetoliveengaged.com/post/does-your-dog-have-the-opportunity-to-say-no-let-s-talk-about-consent )
It is also important to remember that even if you do ALL the things (calm, neutral greetings, consent testing, etc.) the relationship might just not work, for whatever reason, and that is ok!! Your dog is your priority and they must be considered BEFORE making a new addition to your home and family.
Emotional Contagion is a REAL thing!
Your dog will often mirror back your own emotions to you. This is important to remember when doing things like new introductions which may feel scary or anxiety provoking for YOU. Anxiety is not only an energy that can often be felt by others in close proximity, but it can alter your behavior, causing you to do things like create leash tension or become jerky in your movements, all of which can create big feelings in your dog and potentially cause bigger issues. It is important to be self-aware of our emotions and always doing the best we can to emotionally regulate ourselves and our dogs to set everyone up for success. If you're unsure how to do this, schedule a Wellness Consultation so we can discuss emotional regulation skills for humans and dogs and how you can co-regulate as a team and make this your new superpower.
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